The Sewer

 

TW: Depictions of violence, psychological torment, and rape

Wrapping its tentacles around me

Keeping me quiet

Alone in the sewers

I can’t see the outside

Sun bellowing in the deep

Arising from its slumber

Leaving me with interesting thoughts

The amount of light similar to a tiny lamp

The sun shines itself through the manhole

I’m covered in ash and fire

Sewage engulfs me into disease

The tentacles grow in width

No one survives in a sewer like this for long

Disease and starvation are the only outcome

May God have mercy on my soul

God wants me to suffer

I’m slipping on the floor

Face planting into the water

Rats scatter around my hair

Smelling of trash and feces

A distant smile arises in the tunnel

Surrounded by three flamingos

The smile’s a bit creepy

The flamingos dance into formation

“Come dance with us!”

They shout

The smile stares at me

“We’re your oasis, your treasure, your orgy!”

The smile creepily makes its grin wider

The flamingos doing the tango

I’m wearing a sweatshirt

It starts flying off of me

May the dance last forever

I sit in my slumber

Caressing the flamingos

The smile draws me in

Hypnotized by the allure

A difference in the air

Flying around in circles

An Eagle with determination

The Eagle was with five books

The Lord of the Rings, Crime and Punishment, Animal Farm, The Metamorphosis, The Stranger

The draw much less enticing

Though I slip from the smile towards it

Laying with the Eagle

Crime and Punishment in my hands

Raskolnikov appears in the distance

Approaching me with an axe

I panic in anticipation

Towards the manhole I jump

The tentacles pull me downward

My calves so worn

The escape so desperate

So immeasurable

My run towards the flamingos

Caressing my face again

Will the smile protect me?

The smile flees from the scene

Leaving me to attempt a jump

Across the tunnel paved in urine

I run as fast as possible through the tunnels with panic

A familiar video game character’s jump sound echoes

Mario and Luigi warping through the pipes

I jump towards them for safety

Their strength not what I remembered when I was younger

As Raskolnikov slowly approaches

He raises his face to mine

He looks like me

Experience and waves flushing through my veins

A palpable sense of disillusionment

I scurry past and still attempt my escape

Orgies, videogames, banquets, suffering, education, psychosis, politics, movies, philosophers, purring their reign on me

A group of people off in the distance once more

My family, friends, loved ones, I go for their embrace

Their hands surround me, then disappear

I cannot be hugged by ghosts of truth

Slinging slinging

I cannot run much longer

I lie on the disgusting floor and await my fate

Totalized by guilt

Raskolnikov hunts me down to my last breath

He looks me in the eyes

The eyes are mine

He grins menacingly, with a violent swing

As his axe pierces my skull I fade away

My soul partakes in essence finally

No more paranoia to reach it

Flying through wormholes in the sky

I dance in the stars

I sing my lullabies

No more I shout

I cannot be hold

As I fly through the stars

Experience fades

No more enjoyment

Left without escape

I try desperately to fix it

I try to run back and forth

Up and down, all around

Nothing seems to work

Heaven may not be too heavenly after all

The quick realization makes me scurry towards hell

Maybe this will fix it

And surely I will find peace

Hell with its pure destruction

Deserved or no?

Let’s figure it out

I suffer in silence

Hell so baffling

Burning my flesh alive

Eating away my eyeballs

Raping me as I scream

Breaking my arms

Kicking me in the back with steel toe boots

Stabbing me in the stomach

But never releasing the brain

I need to escape now

I cannot move

I cannot fight it

Magnetized by guilt

The last thought in my mind

A desire to return to the sewer

Caged in a cycle of desperation

I relapse for eternity.